Just To Pay The Bills

      A job, profession, workplace, whatever you want to call it, it's the reason most people in the world wake up in the morning. It's what people live for, strive for, work towards, dread, detest, or maybe are passionate about. Some love their work, some hate it. Today I got to see first hand someone who loves what they do, even though it may not be the steadiest or easiest job in the world, and he's passionate about it. Today I volunteered to be a photographer at a local charity event. At first, I thought they were just looking for random high school students who knew their way around a camera to snap a few portraits, and that'd be it. But it turned out that they really needed someone with experience that they could depend on. Someone who could take the reins and get the job done, because if I didn't do it, no one would. I wasn't sure how I felt about this. I do know I was so nervous this morning that I was near passing out. To be depended on in such a way. Thrown into a foreign environment, not sure where to go, what boundaries I can overstep, it's an interesting feeling.
     Before I left, the man I was working for asked me if I would be going into photography as a profession in the future. I replied with a very firm "no". I adore photography, and it's a wonderful hobby, but it's not something I could trust as a steady income. I told him that I would keep it as a lifelong hobby, but that's all it would ever be for me. He replied enthusiastically, saying that's the right thing to do, that I'm very smart not to want to go into photography as my profession. This surprised me, seeing as that's exactly what he did with his life. But he went on to explain how he could go a few months with lots of jobs, paying him a great deal of money to do what he loves. He felt on top of the world in these months. Then of course, he would go several more months with no income at all. Passing out business cards to people who just discarded them immediately.
     My Dad has told me my entire life that I need to find the one thing that I'm truly passionate about, and if I can make a career out of it, I will succeed. Passion drives one to reach their full potential. My Dad was one of the lucky few who found his passion for airplanes as a child, and followed that passion all the way, until he became an airline pilot, being able to do what he loves for a living. That's when I must ask myself...is photography really my passion? And if it is...maybe I should consider it as a career possibility.
     The answer to that question is no. Photography is not my passion. I love it, I think I always will love it. When I'm shooting something really great, and I know it will turn out wonderfully even before I press the shutter release, I do feel that passion. But that's just not enough. There aren't enough of those moments to make up for the instability and hardships of being a professional photographer. One day I'll find my passion. My true passion, not the fleeting moment I feel sometimes with a camera in my hand. When I do find this passion, I know that it will drive me to succeed. Until then, photography will be a wonderful hobby.

 From The Show Today